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May 18, 2011
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Views: 1,100 (1 today)
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Standing alone,
Just like that day,
When I first met you.

surrounded by flowers
They have died long ago,
withered from what they have been through.

From the lack of air
In the chest
From the constant pain
That has never left
And from the tears,
That are no longer poisoned ,at last.

Just one white rose remained alive,
The only thing that could survive,
And managed through it all.

So tell me,
If you are already gone,
How come you are still blooming in my soul?
:iconkagirinai-yume:
I'm pretty satisfied with this one.
my Interpretation (:la:)
-It's a poem about a guy leaving a girl (could be running away,could be death,could be both)

- The flowers that have withered are the flowers inside the girl's heart,as she was heart-broken.

-But even though, one flower is still blooming,a white one, a pure one.the guy is blooming in her heart as she cannot forget him,hope is blooming.

-The tears that usually are supposed to make you feel better afterwards, killed all of the other flowers,as those were tears of hatred and despair.

-She was alone before meeting him, and she thought she was alone as he left,until she noticed that he was always with her,in her heart.


Also,I'd appriciate critiques.
-Any other interpretation?
-do the rymes sound forced?
-Are there lines that are too long?
-Is the message of the poem clear or is it hard to understand?
Thanks!

critique for :iconthewrittenrevolution:
[link]
And thanks so much for reading this :aww:
--
The picture is not mine,googled it.
Add a Comment:
 
:icongolden-knob:
~Golden-Knob Jun 8, 2012  Professional General Artist
This is so beautiful! You can feel the emotion coming from the white flower.
Reply
:iconkagirinai-yume:
~kagirinai-yume Jun 8, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Thank you :)
Reply
:iconlive-life:
I like the idea and feeling behind it :) - I can't write so simple stuff makes more sense to me
Reply
:iconkagirinai-yume:
~kagirinai-yume Jun 20, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
Thank you.:)
I think it's simple mainly because English isn't my mother-language,but it's great to know that it's good the way it is. :iconsuperlaplz:
Reply
:iconlive-life:
Well - English is also my second language -
Reply
:iconkingdomzone:
~kingdomzone Jun 4, 2011  Student Artist
clear, meaningful,beautiful word!! love you title~~~"A flower called hope",even i'm not a girl!=D
Reply
:iconkagirinai-yume:
~kagirinai-yume Jun 4, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
Wow, thank you so much! I'm glad you liked it :aww:
And there's nothing wrong with a guy liking this, on the countray-thanks a lot!
Reply
:iconkingdomzone:
~kingdomzone Jun 4, 2011  Student Artist
lol=D...you deserve it!
Reply
:iconkagirinai-yume:
~kagirinai-yume Jun 4, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
:huggle:
Reply
:iconcauterizesetsfire:
~CauterizeSetsFire Jun 4, 2011  Student General Artist
I love this shot and beautiful words!
Reply
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